You probably have heard the saying, “Love is a choice, not a feeling.” I am not sure I have always understood what that meant. And maybe you have heard this, “Greater love no one has than this, to lay down their life for a friend.”
I think I can intellectually wrap my mind around that, but only because I am a Christian who has heard most of my life that Jesus laid down his life for us. But what does that look like in real life? How does a selfish person like I am choose to love, or even more difficult, sacrifice the things of my life for another?
If I am not “feeling that loving feeling” I struggle with showing love to others, even those closest to me. Now before you go and start thinking I am some really bad person, I love my wife and son more than anything. And yes, I do think that I will lay my life down for either one if the situation warranted it. And I do that now in some ways by giving up things that I want to do or love for their benefit. I even have some friends that make it on that list even though admittedly it’s a short list.
Still, even when I sacrifice things out of love for them, and for that relatively small group of friends, in the deepest crevices of my soul, I expect for them to love me back. That doesn’t look like “love as a choice” or “laying my life down” to me.
Here Is the Big Question
Will You Love Only Those Who Love You Back?
This is when loving others gets challenging.
Seeing churches put a focus on “getting outside of the walls” of the church is a good thing. It does take some selflessness to help people who need help, to take vacation time and finances to go on a short-term mission trip, to mentor a child who has a difficult home situation, and to bring a child from a hard place into your own family.
But what happens to our compassion and love if the less-fortunate person shows no appreciation for our help, or worse, abuses it? What if the people who you spend time and money to share the love of Christ with outright rejects you, maybe even with violence? How many families who bring a child into their home get in return from that child anger and anguish?
Will you continue to love them?
I will be honest with you. I can’t do it.
You probably didn’t expect to hear me say that. But the truth is, neither can you. You and I will take offense. We will decide to not help them ever again or worse to not love them anymore.
How can we choose to love sacrificially in the face of rejection? If we are going to embrace God’s call to live a life sent or on mission, we need to know the answer to this question.
Yes, the answer is Jesus.
But it’s more than just saying Jesus is the Answer. He needs to be the Answer. This is important to understand.
Jesus doesn’t expect us to follow His example. He knows we will fail every single time. Instead He invites us to channel His love.
This Is the Simple Truth.
He describes the relationship like a vine that we are grafted in. His sacrificial love flows through us when we remain in Him.
When we recognize this truth and focus on remaining in Him, then we do love even when others don’t love back.
Will You Love Only Those Who Love You Back? The answer is yes if it is Jesus loving them through you in the first place.
Such good truth! Such a timely reminder with my boy’s behavior as it is right now in this season. It’s hard to do with the meltdowns, pushback, and lack of sleep. But, Jesus….Blessings, Joanne
May He give you strength during this season Joanne.
The death of Jesus was significant because His death did not just cover sin, it redeemed sin. Those who trust in the LORD Jesus Christ as their savior are redeemed or bought out of sin because Jesus paid the full price for sin and offered God”s grace to whoever believes. The death of Jesus was significant because only that death was the complete and final, once for all sacrifice for the sins of the world. “And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all” (Hebrews 10:10). However, there is truth about the death of Jesus on the cross that is overlooked by many. Jesus” physical death or physical separation from His body was significant but it was only after the price for our sin had been paid and Jesus cried “It is finished” that He died physically. His physical death was important because of the resurrection that followed, however, it was not Jesus” physical death that paid the ransom for the sin of man.
I love the “once for all” truths found in Hebrews. Thank you for your comment.