Your Foster or Adopted Child Needs Space to Heal

6 Ways to Give Your Child Space

Summertime with a son is so much different from when we didn’t have any kids. When it was just Danielle and I , summer wasn’t much different than any other time of the year.

 

That is all different now that we have a six-year-old son. Danielle’s main summer job is thinking of ways to keep a very active boy busy. So we spend days at the swimming pool with friends, going out-of-state on a plane for the first time, vacation bible schools, sports camps, visits to family and friends in other towns. Did I leave anything out?

We easily could have signed our son up for a baseball league, a swim team, a soccer league, and gymnastics. Why not? It’s what American, middle-class families do these days. We don’t want our kids to miss out on anything in life. Or, for me at least, I don’t want to hear those words, “Daddy, I am bored!” Besides what will we post on social media if we don’t do all of it?

The thing is a busy schedule might not be the best thing for your foster or adopted child. Some would say it’s not good for any kid.

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When Things Meant to Stay Bonded Together Tear

5 Things I Know Are Still True about God

I sang a rendition of a Twila Paris song at our wedding over 27 years ago—Bonded Together. Originally it’s a love song sung to God, so I slightly altered it and made the person of affection my beautiful bride. I think God (and Twila) was ok with that.

The first verse and part of the chorus goes like this:

Like tightly woven garment, like metal alloy, we are put together in the strongest way. With a common bond to join us that they cannot destroy we are held together in the longest way. And we could not be pulled apart without tearing out a heart. Bonded together…we are bonded together. Bonded Together by Twila Paris

Bonded Together

Two experiences this past week shook me. Both hit me in the same day. One was a relationship. The other a tendon in my ankle. Both torn yet meant to stay bonded together.

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How Telling Your Story Helps You Heal

3 Ways to Tell Your Story

As I watch and read the stories of victims of the recent flooding in Central Texas, I know many are telling their stories over and over. Many volunteers trained in Critical Incident Stress Management (CISM) are purposefully spending their time listening and asking questions to help victims tell their stories. 

Survivors of a sudden event like a natural disaster, the unexpected death of a loved one, finding out they have a terminal illness, etc. often struggle to “make sense” of their new reality. Even though these survivors might need long-term care, a part of the immediate (and long-term) care involves them telling their story in a safe environment.

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Why Our Scars Are not Always a Bad Thing

As I sat listening to a speaker I began inspecting the wear and tear on my 50 plus year old hands. Fingers crooked and swollen from breaks and jams. Scars caused from various wounds. I looked closely at this 1/2 inch scar on my left thumb.

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I remember clearly how I got that scar.

A group of us in our early teens went camping along with two adult sponsors. Each tent had two campers, and we were responsible for cooking our own dinner.

We got the fire going. Put on a pot of baked beans. Then I began peeling a potato with a pocket knife.

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Adoption Changes a Child’s Destiny

You may have heard before that with every adoption there is loss. If a child needs a forever family, it is because something went very wrong. When a family adopts a child, the future of that child is forever altered.

When we began fostering our son, I don’t think I had a real grasp on the influence we had on his future, regardless whether he became a part of our forever family or not. But once we adopted him, I began to see that we had indeed changed his destiny.

(Our son) obviously has not inherited any physical genetics from Danielle or me, but his destiny has been completely altered by our family. What he now will inherit emotionally and spiritually is drastically different from what he would have inherited from his biological family.Adopting the Father's Heart

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7 Reasons Storytelling Is Important

It was the end of a long yet exhilarating week. 10 of us flew to Honduras to drill a water well for some families in a village. Each day began early with breakfast before an hour drive to the village. The day ended with an hour return trip to our hotel for dinner and group time.

We slept hard and fast each night to do it again the following day. On the next to last day of our trip we began our two-day trek back to the city our flight departed.

After several hours on a bus, we arrived at our last hotel. After unpacking and freshening up, we met for dinner. I sat staring at my dinner almost too tired to eat the wonderful meal before me. Yet I ate.

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